Flipping through my sketch book, I realized how perfectly each phase shaped into another; from the idol days to self-portrait days, and now the one-eyed kid days. It sorta fascinates me, the way each phase slowly fades and carry on to the next one. I figure that’s how everything (not limited to time and space) goes, though.
When one relationship gradually shifts into the next stage or slides back to the one before, we'll tend to just let it happen, until sometime later when we’re psychologically ready and look back, then we’ll realize the change. As one can imagine, nobody can ever stop this transformation. While we grow old and learn what we really need, we'll slowly forget our past choices and go with the choice that best fits our current need.
Sometimes I’d wonder though, why I made certain choices during certain stages in life. There are times when I just can’t help but sneer at my foolishness for making that stupid choice at that instant. But I guess that’s how it was. Under that circumstance at that very moment, there was nothing else I could do. It’s a live example of rational choice theory, no?
So it turns out that it’s the choices and decisions that move us along the ladders of life. Whether they were made correctly or not, however, is fully up to us, and only us to justify. No one else can help us decide or regret. We are all alone while making choices and justifying them, as it is our own lives that are placed into our palms and not anyone else’s.
How nice if we get to hand our decisions to a pair of dice, just like in the game of Jumanji eh? At least all we get to sneer at is probability and not ourselves.